Double Bogey

We are all slaves to technology, except for few who have mastered it. I put myself in the latter category until yesterday. Yesterday, my illusions got shattered as technology gave a nasty shock to tell me who the boss was.
It was Saturday and I was in office doing some fire-fighting. In the late afternoon when I realized that I will be spending my evening too in the office itself, I decided to SMS my two friends. The three of us usually go together every Friday night and have tea in some quite corners of Delhi. I tried to make my SMS as funny as possible and wrote:
“Are we having our weekly night orgy today?” This was supposed to be funny because the word ‘orgy’ is a grossly misunderstood word. It actually means a sacred rite, or a party (detailed meaning is available here), but people usually associate with it extreme sexual activity. I knew my friends will laugh heartily after reading this and patted my own back for such achievement.
I dexterously pressed the buttons of my phone, opened the Recent Contacts list and clicked on the first contact. Message went like a breeze. I then proceeded to command my cell phone to send same message to another of my friend, it is at this point that technology decided to put her foot down and tell who commands whom. Just like last time, I again opened the Recent Contacts list, selected the name of next recipient and casually pressed the send button and immediately gasped for air. I had chosen the wrong recipient! The recipient of was someone from my office and the worst part was that the recipient was a girl! I could imagine Technology rubbing her hands and laughing with glee.
I hurriedly opened the Outbox to stop the message from sending but the damage was done much earlier. Now, the only logical thing was to send another message apologizing for the error, but I come from a family of major over-reactors, so I not only sent one long message apologizing for the error but also, to be doubly sure, sent her the meaning of the word itself!
The story does not end here; it so happened that I had got a message from another friend and I had not replied to him at that time. I decided to answer his message; I did not choose the Reply option and instead composed another message. This time again, the buttons played their part well and the message was again sent to her.
I wonder what she might be thinking now. Damned double bogey!

Underwear Shopping

Let me make it clear in the very beginning, I don’t like shopping and when it comes to buying something as mundane as underwear then I ask someone else to do it for me. Usually an easy target is my brother. The problem is that such shops have assortment of items and most of the items are are for girls. It is most embarrassing for me to walk down in a shop full of girls and ask for my stuff. It has happened to me once - the girls passed sly glances at me and then giggled in chorus. I came out without buying anything.
I was forced to go into one of these shops this time because my friend, who equally abhors such shopping orgies, had to buy one of these necessities for himself. Faced with no choice, I accompanied him to what looked like one of the more respectable stores where shopkeepers and sales people don’t make you feel like a sinner who has come to atone for a murder one has just committed.
Just as I dreadfully entered the shop my brilliant mind popped out an idea. It happens so many times that the best of the ideas come to you in most unexpected fashion. It happens that you are walking down the road and you see a passer-by crossing the road and an idea hits you, which is potent enough to transform human lives forever. It happened to Newton when he saw an apple falling down. It happened to somebody called Archimedes - the idea was so powerful that it made him run naked on streets of Rome. The next person in queue after Archimedes and Newton was me – the idea came to me the very moment I had crossed the threshold of the shop, like a shutter which has just opened.
It occurred to me how I could make it one of the better experiences in life, so along with my friend I decided to buy one for myself too, and suddenly I transformed myself to one of the most enthusiastic underwear shoppers. I first asked the salesman to give me some floral patterned underwear which, as expected, he did not have for men. Then I asked him to show me one with animals on it which again, as expected, he did not have for men. I then asked him for one with butterflies print, again the answer was in negative.
My friend, all this while had been looking, nay, gaping at me with his mouth open. And before I forget to mention, he had turned scarlet as well. I, meanwhile, continued with my shopping and asked the salesman for a mauve coloured variety. He did not even know what mauve colour was, nor did I, but it does not matter. Next I asked him for orange colour, which surprisingly, he did have and I purchased it.
I confess that I liked them. The colour was different, bold and extravagant. Since then, I have been resisting the temptation of wearing them over my pants.